The following scripture from Matthew and commentary from Watchman Nee address the important issue of choosing God’s will over our own. Today’s blog post explores the important distinction between burden and cross.
And he that doth not take his cross and follow after me, is not worthy of me. Matthew 10.38.
Watchman Nee writes:
“A burden is not a cross. Burden is something inescapable; the cross, however, is subject to personal choice and can therefore be avoided. What the first cross in history was, so the countless smaller crosses will be which shall follow afterwards: just as the original cross was chosen by the Lord, so the crosses for today must also be chosen by us. Some people assume that they are bearing the cross whenever they fall into some hardship or encounter some distress. This is not true, however, for these kinds of things may quite naturally happen to any person even if that person is not a believer.
What then is a cross? It must be akin to what the Lord Jesus himself has said: “My Father, … thy will be done” (Matt. 26.42). The Lord asks His Father not to answer as He the Son wills, but as the Father wills. This is the cross. To take the cross is to choose the will which the Father has decided.”
Choosing God’s Will
This passage—Matthew 10:38—combined with Watchman Nee’s commentary, invites a profound reflection on the true meaning of discipleship and spiritual maturity. At its heart is the distinction between burden and cross, and the pivotal spiritual decision to willingly choose the will of God, even when it conflicts with our own. Let’s explore this further to deepen understanding.
Burden vs. Cross: The Crucial Distinction
Watchman Nee emphasizes that a burden is something that happens to us—illness, disappointment, financial trouble, or personal loss. These things, though heavy, are part of the human experience and can affect anyone, believer or not. A cross, however, is not about what happens to us; it is about how we respond to what happens—by willingly choosing God’s will over our own desires.
Jesus’ own example in Gethsemane is the perfect model. He did not stumble accidentally onto the cross. He chose it. He laid down His own will—“not My will, but Yours be done”—and walked in total submission to the Father, knowing it would lead to suffering and death.
This means that a “cross” isn’t defined by pain or hardship alone. The defining factor is voluntary surrender: choosing God’s will. You can be suffering and still not be bearing a cross, if your heart is resisting God’s will. Conversely, you can be walking in quiet, humble obedience, enduring something not outwardly dramatic, and yet be carrying your cross faithfully.
The Cross Is a Choice
This is where spiritual depth comes into play: the cross can be avoided. It is never forced on us. Just as Jesus could have called twelve legions of angels to avoid Calvary (Matthew 26:53), we too can retreat from obedience when it’s costly. We can live safely in the realm of self-will, avoiding sacrifice, preferring comfort, recognition, or control.
But to take up our cross is to make a conscious decision to obey God in the places where obedience costs us something—reputation, ambition, pride, or even relationships.
To take up the cross, then, is:
- To forgive when you want to retaliate.
- To speak truth when silence is easier.
- To give when you’d rather keep.
- To obey when it seems like everyone else is doing the opposite.
- To say, “Not my will,” when your whole body is aching for something else.
This is where transformation happens. This is where Christ is formed in us.
Choosing the Cross
Jesus said, “He who does not take his cross and follow after me is not worthy of me.” That’s a sobering statement. It tells us that to follow Jesus is not a passive association, but an active, sacrificial alignment with His way of life.
Choosing God’s will is not about self-hate or seeking pain. It’s about radical alignment with God’s purposes. When we choose the cross, we become vessels through which God’s love and power flow. It is through death to self that resurrection life comes. As Paul wrote, “I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me” (Galatians 2:20).
Encouragement for the Journey
If you find yourself at a fork in the road—between choosing self-will and choosing God’s will—know that the choice of the cross is the path to the deepest joy, the most enduring peace, and the greatest intimacy with Christ. You may lose something in the short term, but you will gain the riches of God’s presence, the shaping of your character, and the beauty of a life truly surrendered.
To take up the cross is to say: “Lord, I trust You more than I trust myself. Even if I don’t understand, I will follow. Not my will, but Yours be done.”
That is the life of a disciple. And in that surrender, there is resurrection.
A Prayer of Surrender to the Cross
Heavenly Father,
In the stillness of this moment, I come before You, aware of how often I cling to my own way—my comfort, my control, my desires. And yet, I hear the voice of Jesus calling, “Take up your cross and follow Me.” Lord, I confess: I have often mistaken hardship for obedience, and discomfort for sanctification, without ever yielding my will to Yours.
Teach me the difference, Lord.
Help me see that the cross is not simply what happens to me, but what I choose. It is the sacred act of laying down my will and saying with my Savior, “Not my will, but Yours be done.”
Give me courage to choose obedience over ease, faithfulness over popularity, and truth over convenience. Teach me to trust that Your will is not only higher than mine—it is also better, wiser, and full of love. When fear whispers that surrender is loss, remind me that true life is only found through death to self.
Form in me the heart of Christ—a heart that embraces the cross with joy, knowing resurrection life lies on the other side.
Today, Lord, I take up my cross. Not as a burden to be endured, but as a gift to be chosen. Not because I am strong, but because You are faithful.
Lead me, Lord. I will follow.
Amen.
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